Here are a few parting tips to keep in mind as you start the negotiation process, so you can keep the fights clean and the lovin’ hot:

• Be honest, but also be open-minded. Agree that all ideas will be discussed (without rolling your eyes), and that you’ll both look at this an as opportunity to try something new

• Make sure you each have space to display meaningful personal objects. You may not understand why he has a collection of stuffed microbes, but they make him happy

• Major purchases like sofas, rugs, and bedspreads should be decided on together, since these have a big impact on how a room feels